on body image

I've been hard on myself lately. At first, I celebrated because my physical recovery from labor and birth was easier than with my firstborn. I assumed that since it was easier, all the other things would also come quickly - like fitting back into regular pants.

And I've been disappointed and frustrated. I gained weight on my hips and thighs during this pregnancy, whereas I had not when I carried my son. It will be a longer process of exercise and healthy eating to get this weight off, and for now, it's not very possible for me to get much extra exercise in! And I'm sleep deprived and fighting a cold, so I'm resting as much as I can. Not a very helpful situation that way!

In the meantime, my husband has continued to praise me and say he loves the way I look. He likes the yoga pants. It's okay that I'm not the same shape. He loves me.

I know that I am loved and that my body did a beautiful thing in giving life to this little girl, and that it continues to do an amazing thing in nourishing her and providing the comfort she and her big brother need. The loads of laundry, hugs, diaper changes, clothing changes, swaddles, tossing footballs, coloring with crayons, cooking meals, wiping faces and dozens of messes are my gift to my children and my husband. Their clean faces and content smiles are the evidence of the work my body has done for them. Why should I be so hard on myself that it's not the shape I had hoped so soon?

I need patience and grace to wait and work through this time. I need to focus on the little things, the beautiful, good, wonderful things. The pounds gained by my chubby little cherub. The smiles and silly laughs of my toddler. The hugs and reassurance of my husband. The love and support of friends. The beauty of redemption and self sacrifice.

Breathing and trusting that things will be well. That all things are beautiful in their time, and that I will again reach my personal goals. All will be well.

Two

Joshua is two!

It's unbelievable, really. My tiny baby is now a 35.5" tall, 25lb, talking and toilet trained toddler. What?!

The morning of his birthday, he had birthday pancakes. We sang the "Happy Birthday" song to him, and he got to blow out candles for the first time! He has been saying "Happy birthday Joshua, I blow fire," ever since. Too cute! 

Later in the morning on his birthday, some of our neighborhood friends stopped by with a gift for Joshua: a new dump truck! They also stayed and played for a little while, and enjoyed reading a book together with "Grandma Sue."

On Saturday, Nana and Grandpa were here all day! There was much playing, reading, jumping, and even a trip to Trader Joe's and Five Guys for lunch. 

He loves tractors and construction vehicles lately, so his party had to be full of tractors. I made cupcakes and a pan of brownies to stand in for a cake. Yes, I did buy the wrong boxed mix at the store. Hazard of shopping with said toddler.

"Digger" tractors like backhoes are his favorite, so I mixed up some yellow frosting and piped that onto the brownies. I crumbled some Wegman's brand "oreo" cookies into the front loader to stand in for rocks and dirt. Dirt was one of Joshie's clearest first words. A sign, perhaps?

Joshua again enjoyed having people sing to him, and the opportunity to "blow fire" with Daddy.

 

 
Joshie was excited about the paint he got from Brad and me, and asked to paint right away. That was a no-go, but he did get to play with the set of construction vehicles that Aunt Elizabeth sent! He didn't let go of the "digger" tractor for about four days straight, even taking it to bed and naps with him.

We had Joshua's good friend, Jo (and his parents and sister, of course), over for the party, and all of Joshua's grandparents were all able to be there this year. Much fun was had by all!

please note that Joshua and the tractors are inseparable

Still can't believe we've been parents for two years, and that our second sweet blessing is coming so soon!

little things

Cultivating a spirit of gratefulness:

1. Zestar apples. So delicious. I love the tastes of fall in this area of the country.
2. A sunny, highs in the 70's day to play outside with my little boy
3. The delight on said little boy's face when he realized the tractors were outside our house (they're fixing the city gas lines)
4. Having a few neighborhood boys my son's age that enjoy playing and sharing with him, and their sweet grandmother who is so generous and kind to me
5. The rhythmic, soothing normal-ness of knitting
6. Snuggling with my husband
7. A cozy meal in the oven
8. Feeling my active baby girl kick me and make my belly bounce
9. Friends who love the "me" I already am
10. The promise of a visit from family this weekend.

What are you thankful for?

Joshua's first birthday

Whew, a year has come and gone! Joshua is ONE!

I started party planning back in August, I think, with this Pinterest board. I hope you can see that...let me know if you have trouble with the link.

First, a theme: rockets! How fun for a little guy, right? I thought so. And hey, I get to pick, since he's not telling me what he wants just yet ;)

I figured I'd make a rocket cake, stick with red and blue as theme colors, and maybe go with some galactic symbols here and there: stars, planets, aliens? Big brainstorm time.

In my planning, I also wrote a poem for his birthday invitation, which looked like this, thanks to some conveniently free clip art included in Publisher:

 Ta-da! Now we're rolling.
So, now for some pictures of the day.

 We gave Joshua his first-ever balloons to play with. Closely supervised, of course.

 I made star-shaped sugar cookie cutouts for the take-home gift for our guests.

The rocket cake was made out of a 9"x11" sheet cake (funfetti, of course). I trimmed the cake into the body of the rocket, and then used the scraps to form the wings on the sides of the rocket. The jets were yellow cake cupcakes in foil cups, frosted with red and orange frosting to look fiery.  I used a regular vanilla buttercream recipe for the frosting, tinting it with Wilton's gel paste food coloring as needed. Please note that it matches the rocket on the invitation; I was so happy with how it turned out!

 The rest of the yellow cake cupcakes, one of which was reserved for the birthday boy, were frosted in the same white vanilla buttercream, and sprinkled with blue sugar. Those are Hershey's kisses in the background, and one of our blue table runners from our wedding reception underneath.

 Joshua holds onto a willing hand to walk around the house and visit guests. So sweet. Also, he was pretty much permanently attached to that balloon.

 First cake ever. Clearly, a big hit.

 I kept the menu simple, with fresh fruit (thank you, Grandma Burr), a little veggie tray, crackers and cheese, and the desserts, of course. In the corner of the photo, you can see my star banner that I made! I wish I had a better photo of that, but forgot to take a good picture. We also decorated with pictures of Joshua from each month of his life, hung on a white cotton string with clothespins. There was also a banner of blue and silvery-blue triangles that we used at my baby shower for Joshua just over a year ago.

 Yes. The cake was satisfactory.

 A worn out birthday boy and two happy parents, celebrating one whole year! Also, more of that star banner I mentioned.

Happy birthday, big guy! We love you so much.

Goodness and grace

More times than I can count, Brad and I have come to the end of our ability and the bottom of our savings and have found blessings instead.

Each other.

A home.

Food on the table.

Our loving family and friends.

Our church.

The clothing on our backs.

And so much more.


This time, we also found freedom from our medical debts and a large financial gift from our church family, who knew how hard it had become for us to make ends meet.

I hesitated to write about this, because I felt a little guilty enjoying these undeserved, unearned blessings! This post reminded me that God delights in giving good gifts to His children, and that it's alright, it's encouraged, that we enjoy them!

So with a thankful, beyond grateful, joyful heart, I ask you to celebrate with me, friends!

One of our small group leaders approached us a couple weeks ago with a financial gift from our church. A large gift. Because they knew how hard it was for us to make ends meet lately. The size that will allow us to replace the broken windshield on our car, put food on our table, buy a few gifts for our family, fill an Operation Christmas Child box, and put something in our savings account. We are so grateful and floored with the generosity of our church family to us.

I recently humbled myself and applied for charity care for our medical bills. Paying pennies on thousands owed each month was squeezing our already tight budget, and I found myself deciding between a $2 box of cereal and a box of Kleenex. Deciding whether or not to buy cheese, or a bag of apples. Telling myself that I could make sandwich bread instead of buying a $1.50 loaf. Feeding our child from our plates instead of buying pureed and pouch-packaged baby food. Cutting every corner I thriftily could.

And then, all four of our medical bills were either reduced or forgiven, and we were able to pay the remaining balance this month.

Hallelujah!

So, we bought some meat for our freezer. Fresh veggies and fruits for the fridge. Sandwich bread and Kleenex. (Because the baby has a cold, and the hubby needs sandwiches when he packs his lunch for work). We feel abundantly blessed, and look forward to this new freedom to bless others. And to save! And to share our joy with you.

thrifting again!

Saturday morning was Joshua's first yard sale trip with his Mommy! We met up with Meg, who blogs over here. She invited us to check out the community-wide yard sale event just a few miles from our new home, and there were so many great things!

It was difficult to find parking, but we succeeded in finding a space for our big SUV. I set up the stroller, plopped Joshua in, put his sun hat on his head, and headed out!

The neighborhood was so beautiful, with nicely planned gardens, well-kept homes, and friendly people. There were so many great sales, too! I spent a whopping five dollars. Here's the breakdown:

Two dollars for...

...a belly band (for my next pregnancy... not anytime too soon!) in black. Similar ones retail for about $18, and you can see how it's used here. The one I borrowed from my friend, Sarah, allowed me to wear my non-maternity pants for all of my pregnancy. Yes, maternity pants were more comfortable at about 8 months and following, but I could still wear the non-maternity jeans, and it felt GREAT.

One dollar for...

...a gently used Nalgene On-The-Go bottle in a vivid lime green. Sanitized in my dishwasher, and bam! About $10 saved.

One dollar for...

...two, count 'em, two, Pyrex refrigerator dishes, like this blue one. That would have set me back about $10 each at an antique store. Now I have three blue and one aqua, and I'm only missing one lid. I also have two small dishes - one red, one pink - and two large yellow dishes. Yay!

One dollar for...

...an adorable nautical romper, a lot like this one, for my baby boy. He wore it that very day to a friend's first birthday party!

And that, my friends, is five dollars well-spent. A modest guess of how much I saved off of retail prices? About $60.

To add to the fun, I had been to one of my favorite thrift shops earlier in the week with my sweet baby. He enjoyed his nap in the Ergo carrier while I enjoyed some thrifting...that's a win-win situation. I found him a little fisherman's floppy sun hat (similar to this, for $20), a set of about 120 colored blocks, similar to these (about $20), and six children's picture books, including a Pat the Bunny ABC book, a Baby Einstein book, a Priddy book, a beautifully illustrated Max Lucado children's story, and a book of Bible stories. It just happened to be 25% off everything day, so the blocks came to $7.50, the books were just $4, and the hat was $4. Amount saved instead of purchasing brand new? About $80.

Oh! And just this past Monday, Stephanie and I took our boys to Once Upon a Child, where we found adorable little shoes and summer clothes for them. It's so easy to overspend there, and I did spend more than I meant to spend. Alas, it was all for good deals and for things my baby can use all summer. Hooray for thrifting! Hooray for friends! Hooray for sisters!

And thanks be to God for the many ways he has blessed us. We have so much more than we need, and I am grateful.

the Liebster award

These are the rules for the Liebster Award:

~Thank the blogger who presented you with the Liebster Award, and link back to his or her blog.
~Answer the 11 questions from the nominator; list 11 random facts about yourself, and create 11 questions for your nominees.
~Present the Liebster Award to 11 bloggers, who have blogs with 200 followers or less, whom you feel deserve to be noticed. Leave a comment on the blogs letting the owners know they have been chosen. (No tag backs.)
~Upload the Liebster Award image to your blog.
~ Linnea's new rule: don't feel that you must participate. This is solely for fun. 

Thanks again to Sara at The Emet Mommy for nominating me for the award! It's sweet of you to like my little blog enough to promote it.

Now, normally, I'm a rule follower. I like neat little boxes and square corners. I like neat, clean, predictable. But I really don't like stuff like this. I do understand that it can drive traffic to one's blog, which is great, but I feel pigeonholed, like the friendship bread thing, or like chain letters, or those ridiculous "repost this or God doesn't love you" things on Facebook.  

So I'm gonna break the rules a bit, and allow y'all to do the same. (Did you see that? A Yankee girl using y'all. If that's not rule breaking...)

Here are the 11 questions I have to answer:

1. What's your favorite color?

   Blue. Almost any shade of blue, but I love the lighter ones best.

2. Do you think you are beautiful? Why or why not?

   Yes. Because beauty comes from the inside out, and I'm continually relying on God to change me for the better. Besides, my husband thinks I am, so it must be true! ;o)

3. Are you evening gown or jeans and T-shirt?

  Both? I love dressing up, but I wear nicer casual clothes almost every day.

4. Who is your personal hero?
 My mommy. She's a great friend, and has given so much to take care of me.

5. What's on your ipod these days?
I don't actually know where my iPod is, but I've been listening to some choral music on YouTube in preparation for a concert! Rachmaninoff, Culloton, Whitacre...

6. What's your favorite thing to cook?
Spaghetti. Quick, easy, and delicious.

7. Why do you blog?
I love that there's a way for me to spill all my thoughts on a "page" without having to run my mouth at my hubby when he first gets home - haha! It means that I can share what's on my mind without being the-annoying-one-who-doesn't-stop-talking. And I can delete things I didn't mean to say. It also helps me to visually focus on the positive things in my life and helps me to gain perspective! Besides, I like the community.

8. What is your favorite time of day?
Morning, with sun streaming in. 

9. Coffee or tea?
Tea, please. No sugar or cream, unless it's a chai latte. 

10. When you get to Heaven what do you hope to hear God say?
"Well done, daughter."

11. Will Ferrell love him or hate him?

 Indifferent.

Here are 11 random facts about me:

1.I'm cutting out dairy to see if it helps my son feel better. He has been a very fussy baby since day one, and I'm hoping this helps!
2. I love ice cream, (especially Turkey Hill's Extreme Cookies and Cream) therefore, the previous is difficult.
3. I play the piano.
4. I prefer impressionist art, but appreciate almost all fine art.
5. There are only three colors of nail polish in my current collection, and I haven't used them since my baby was born!
6. I wish I could figure out how to fit in running and Pilates in each day.
7. I'm looking for more cloth diapers to add to my collection of 12.
8. I've been to all but 10 of the United States. Most of those I haven't visited are on the West Coast.
9. My first kitten was orange.
10. I had an orange-themed birthday party when I turned 15.
11. I have some silver hairs, and  I'm not even 30 yet. I've decided not to dye them, either.
12. I hate feeling like I must write on my blog. This is purely for fun and positivity.

Here are the 11 questions for the bloggers I nominated:

1. Do you prefer being indoors or outdoors/ Why?

2. Do you have any siblings? Do you feel that it affects who you are now?

3. What do you do for exercise?

4. If you could be anywhere in the world for 24 hours, where would you go and what would you do?

5. What or who inspires you?

6. What comes to mind when you think of the word "honor"?

7. Do you have a favorite breakfast cereal? What is it? (For the record, I have two faves: Cheerios, General Mills brand only, and Cracklin' Oat Bran.)

8. Mac or PC? Why?

9. Pen, pencil, or crayons?

10. Tell me about your pet(s). Or, if you don't have one, tell me about a "pet" idea or project of yours.

11. What keeps you from taking the steps to become what you've dreamed?

Here are the (eight) blogs I nominated:

 Loving Life with the Landins

Chasin' Cakes 

(Not As) Big Bob 

Back and Better Than Ever
Weekly Scripture Reflections
Floral & Fudge
Jim & Suzy in Ecuador
Crispin Chronicles

little things

Here's the promised post on the little things - the often overlooked, but truly important things that make life beautiful!

1. Watching the gently falling snow from the warmth of our church sanctuary, during...
2. ...yet another meaningful and memorable sermon and time of worship with friends. We are truly blessed to be a part of this church.
3. A cozy Oscar-cat on my lap (what little is left of my lap)
4. Morning walks in the brisk weather with my friend, Kelly, and her little boy
5. Safety on our trips to and from my parents' house for Thanksgiving
6. The blessing of a family that really does get along well most of the time
7. Hearing my husband pray with thankfulness for our family, and with joy for our soon-to-come son. Such a treasure to be his wife and the mother of his child!
8. Having more than enough to eat, a warm house to sleep in, and all our basic needs met, once again
9. Being completely done with Christmas shopping and wrapping, except for this one last gift for my sister
10. Finding out that our baby will have yet another cousin...due in July! That makes two cousins on one side, and another cousin on the other side. Exciting!

Three sisters-in-law and mommas-to-be!

God has been so good to us, even through our difficulty financially. We have so much in each other, in our family, and in our friends. Truly blessed!

a little love

Early last month, I began preparing for The Valentine's Day Card-Making Girls'-Night-In.

It didn't work last year - no one could be there, and admittedly, I started a little too late to find a free night in most ladies' schedules. But this year, it was successful. And so fun!

First, there were cupcakes. They were confetti cupcakes covered in homemade chocolate icing. Linnea tasted and saw that it was good, but then decided that they most certainly needed handmade heart-shaped picks to be complete. True?

True, indeed.


And then there was the trip to the dollar store for conversation heart candies, which found their way onto these sugar cookies:

Here is the point at which I am most grateful for the Betty Crocker sugar cookie mix packages. They're so easy. The cookies don't require refrigeration before they can be rolled out, either = genius.

I had fun choosing the candies for each heart to say something creative, as you might imagine.

Here are two of the ladies that joined me for card-making and consumption of copious amounts of chocolate - note the counter full of goodies.

We enjoyed chocolate milk (thanks, Sally!), chocolate coconut cupcakes (delicious, Jamie!), amazing cream cheese sandwich cookies and jelly-filled heart shaped cookies (many thanks to Jennifer), in addition to the two treats I showed you above.


We also had time between bites to create Valentine's Day cards. This was guise under which we got together, and it was quite an effective ruse for the eating of chocolate and the neglecting of homework and the hours of conversation.

See? Productive. And cute! Look at Jennifer's card for her hubby:

And Jamie's for her husband:

Sally left before we could get a group picture. It was, admittedly, rather late at night by this point.

Still silly and sugary sweet.

Here are the cards that I made for my sister, sisters-in-law, MIL, and my mom:

I love how they turned out! Sally brought some really beautiful paper that she made, and I loved adding that to my cards. I did some hand sewing to add an extra special detail to the lace, too.

the tooth fairy, grapes, Harry Potter, Miss Rhode Island, Braveheart, et al

The College Choir has an annual October party which usually falls sometime near Halloween. Costumes are most definitely involved. Tonight's shenanigans at the director's house included a campfire and s'mores, kickball (me in sequined ballet flats, too), the judging of costumes by the director's three children, doughnuts, cider, and friendly conversation. Much silliness was had by all.

Of note were the following ingenious costumes:

a mermaid
soccer referee
a bunch of grapes - complete with a stem made of her dreadlocked hair
Harry Potter himself, though much taller than pictured in film, and sadly, without his owl friend
Miss Rhode Island, especially notable for her light-up heels
Braveheart, wearing both a plaid kilt and a blue spandex suit underneath
various other choir members, as themselves
and me, the tooth fairy.

What, you didn't know? The tooth fairy wears light purple and aqua wings, liberally sprinkled with sparkles, sports a silvery dress, and silver sequined shoes. She also wears lots of sparkly eye shadow, costume jewelry, and ribbon in her hair. And gloves and tights, since it's October in New York state. She also carries a tooth brush wand, complete with sparkly blue "toothpaste."

The things I do for choir... :o)

new baby, new hat...of course!

A friend of mine just welcomed her first little one - a baby girl, whose first initial is "J." Hubby and I planned to go see the family today and enjoy lunch together. But first...

1. I made chocolate chip cookies. Pretty sure that new mom loves chocolate and has no time for baking. Check.

2. I made a cute baby hat with new baby J's initial. Felt very knit-savvy, as I used yarn from my stash (sport weight acrylic) and made up my own pattern, down to the initial and heart motif. Love.

Both new parents loved the little hat, and baby J didn't mind modeling it as she slept. She's so precious!
Pardon the fuzzy picture from hubby's phone. Best we could do while baby was sleeping!

And on a completely different subject, my photography hobby could potentially be more expensive. But it's so cute!! If only I could justify the purchase... I might have to actually get paid for picturing first. Sigh. But my black case (which is functional) screams "I'm a camera! Steal me!" And I really want a cute bag. But I can't (won't?) pay that much. Love their bags anyway! I think the Clover design is my favorite.

homemade mac n' cheese

I needed a side dish to take to our friends' house last night for dinner, and I was totally stumped... until I remembered this deliciousness. I didn't have enough potatoes, though, so I swapped in elbow macaroni. I also had onion this time, so I added that, and topped it with bread crumbs and paprika after it was finished baking. And I used my new vintage Pyrex dish. Love.


There's the ready-to-go dish in my picnic basket!
It was a big hit - I'm surprised we have even a spoonful left!

baking for music nerds

Hubby and I went to worship band rehearsal on Thursday, and were reminded that the music ministry teams would have a booth at Sunday's ministry fair. "Would anyone be willing to make a snack?" the team leader asked. (Please don't ask me. I don't feel like it.) "Cookies?" (Hubby looks at me with a big smile) "Maybe cookies shaped like music notes?" (Uh, oh. Hubby knows that I have a music-note shaped cookie cutter.)

"Linnea can make cookies!" hubby volunteers. (Darn. Now I have to. And I have to admit that yes, I am a music nerd, and yes, I do have an eighth-note shaped cookie cutter, though it was a gift.)

We went to get groceries that evening anyway, so I picked up the cheater package of Betty Crocker's sugar cookie mix. Add butter, one egg, and we're golden. No waiting two hours for it to refrigerate, and it makes a good number of cookies. Done.

I made the cut outs, baked them, and made my own vanilla frosting to make up for the lack of homemade-ness from the Betty Crocker mix. The cookies actually do taste pretty great, and I can't tell the difference. So I didn't tell anyone at church...not yet, anyway. I don't think they'll mind, either.

I borrowed my friend Kristen's rather extensive sprinkle collection to top off these sugary beauties. She has no less than 20, yes, twenty, kinds of sprinkles, including shapes like teddy bears, gingerbread men, snowmen, dolphins, alphabet letters, and cows(!). I decided to go with just the sugars and nonpareils. I became especially fond of the mixed colored sugar, and almost squirreled it away into my cake decorating cabinet...but that would be bad. So I may just have to buy my own!

Here are the cute (and tasty and almost gone) results:

kittens

Kittens are some of the cutest things in the world! Clara belongs to our friends, Doug and Jennifer. She's a pretty cat, and sweet. Her five kittens are adorable:





The orange one is too cute - wanting to snuggle with his siblings, and cuddling with mama Clara.

Exploring their very big world with their little whiskers and tiny paws...and back legs that don't quite work yet!