little things

Cultivating a spirit of gratefulness:

1. Zestar apples. So delicious. I love the tastes of fall in this area of the country.
2. A sunny, highs in the 70's day to play outside with my little boy
3. The delight on said little boy's face when he realized the tractors were outside our house (they're fixing the city gas lines)
4. Having a few neighborhood boys my son's age that enjoy playing and sharing with him, and their sweet grandmother who is so generous and kind to me
5. The rhythmic, soothing normal-ness of knitting
6. Snuggling with my husband
7. A cozy meal in the oven
8. Feeling my active baby girl kick me and make my belly bounce
9. Friends who love the "me" I already am
10. The promise of a visit from family this weekend.

What are you thankful for?

little things

It has really been too long since my last post. I have been busy: washing baby clothes, preparing for choir rehearsals, cleaning, napping, laundering, washing dishes, baking, napping... third trimester is a bit tiring! But, anyway, here are the little things for which I am thankful:

My morning glories don't know that it's fall. I don't mind.

1. bright orange, white, green, and yellow gourds decorating my coffee table
2. cozy sweaters that still (kinda) fit
3. lots of hugs from the hubby
4. knowing that I've made and frozen the three kinds of Christmas cookies I've been meaning to make for this coming season
5. checking Christmas gifts off the list
6. hearing at my last baby checkup that the little guy's heartbeat is "perfect"
7. enough food, water, gas, blankets, and candles to make it through the coming BIG STORM
8. my very entertaining, sweet sister and her roommate
9. friends who ask how I really am and care to pray for me
10. being able to go to our small-group Bible study two weeks in a row

...and so much more, of course. Like waking up next to my husband and being pulled in close to him, held tightly and safely for just five more minutes before we start the day. Like this time of unemployment that helps me feel less stressed about preparing for our baby's arrival. Like the opportunity we had to participate in music at church yesterday.

God is good. I hope you can rest in Him today!

positive post.

And now I will count my blessings:

1. Hubby and I will be together tonight. Yay! He has a job - another hooray!
2. Dinner is in the crock pot = less work for me. And I think hubby will love it - Sausage and Cheese Chowder.
3. I have already vacuumed and dusted and swept. All that's left to clean is the bathroom. (And do laundry. And file papers. But this is a blessing post, right?)
4. Grapefruit was the same price per pound as apples yesterday. Guess who bought beautiful ruby-red grapefruit instead of apples? Yes, me. Happy.
5. The fall colors are fewer and farther between, but they're lovely. I like how they begin to look darker, richer, red/brown-er as the fall fades.
6. The sunset tonight is beautiful - pink clouds with purple undersides, coral/pink sky, bare tree silhouettes. (Huh. "Silhouettes" is a French word we actually pronounce almost correctly in American English.)
7. My kitties are particularly snuggly today.
8. I have cute little fall decorations on the dining room table, and my "spiced pumpkin" scented candle is lit.
9. I am currently scheduling courses for my final semester of schoolwork. Final. Semester. This much closer to a Master's degree and a permanent NYS certification in Music Education.
10. I got to conduct in rehearsal a lot more often this week than usual. Good for me, and fun. More work, but fun.


There. Ten blessings. And a thankful heart, for God has provided everything I need.

Oh! and an eleventh: I have gummy-bear vitamins. That is all.

and today at grad school

And today at grad school, I used a power tool!!

Well, just an electric screwdriver, but it was cool. We just got a new Wenger folder cabinet for the choir folders, and I had to readjust the height of the shelves to accommodate our binders. This meant eight screws and Linnea wielding a bright orange Black & Decker screwdriver. Awesome. It brought a wee bit of self-sufficient happy to my day.

In other news, I also bought a $13 t-shirt for $5 at the campus store, followed soon thereafter by the news that my $60 parking ticket had been reduced to $5. Win.

I ate a quick lunch, accompanied for an hour, and went to class... finding out that I most certainly have an A for this half of the semester. Sweetness.

There's a tree on campus that has some strange looking fruit that looks like an overgrown cherry with bumps all over it. I have since discovered that it's a Kousa Dogwood, and the fruit is edible! It tastes like a peach with a really weird texture. It's a soft, fleshy orange color on the inside, and the skin is reddish orange. Cool!

Many reasons for happy. So many more than what's here. I'm blessed!

thanks for today, bright hope for tomorrow

The first pumpkin pie of the season, from scratch, of course.

"...blessings all mine, with ten thousand beside." From the hymn Great is Thy Faithfulness - and God's faithfulness to us has truly been great.

Early this week, my husband was just hired at a new job! He had been out of work for exactly six months, and God provided for our needs in every bit of that "desert" time. Like the Israelites who spent 40 years in the desert after their flight from Egypt, our shoes and clothes did not wear out, we did not go hungry, and God blessed us beyond our need. Friends sent anonymous checks. The insurance money from my February accident paid for six months of bills. A couple we barely know felt led to give us their 2003 Jeep. For free. I found a three-week job teaching music. We celebrated our third anniversary. We were able to pay for my third semester of grad school, out of pocket, without taking another loan. My textbooks were mercifully inexpensive. We haven't had any medical bills. There have been no more accidents. We had the money to replace a cracked radiator in one of the cars. He has been faithful to us.

And He has given us hope for tomorrow. Hubby's new job is in a city with many possibilities for me as a music teacher. The position is one where he has set hours, the possibility of twice-a-year raises in his salary, and it's a positive work environment. The new apartments he has been looking at in the area seem nice, and the people seem friendly. This will mean a challenge for us in some ways, but there's a light at the end of the tunnel: graduation is coming. In another six months, I will have completed my degree. We can look for a more permanent place to live. We can build more permanent ties with a church and community. We can even (perhaps!) begin a family together. There is hope for tomorrow.

Here are some things I took joy in today:

We live in a place with so much beauty!

A walk along our road...

...the beautiful repeating pattern of thistles
and the star-shaped skeletons of summer's flowerseven dried-out corn has some sort of beauty, poetry to it - And who but God could have dreamed of rainbow colored leaves?
Just beautiful.

creativity and sunshine

I'm absolutely loving this sunny fall weather! Blue skies, perfectly colorful leaves, and the warmth - but with that crisp, autumn scent. Bliss.

I had some fun today packaging up a gift for my husband's cousin, who will have a baby girl in December. I made some cute pink booties for her, and bought a 1963 vintage copy of a Little Golden Book to use for the "card." But the book should have a bookmark, so I made one. Then I got a little more inspired, and wrote a poem about learning to read. And then it had to be on a scrapbook page... you know how this goes!

First, the booties. Pink acrylic yarn, Mary Jane strap, pink flower button. Cute!
And the book, with the bookmark:
Inspiration - there must be a poem! Enter the scrapbook page, ready for a photo of the new baby princess when she arrives.
Here's the text of the poem that I wrote on her scrapbook page:
---
As you learn and grow and play
finding wonder in each day,
may letters and words unlock for you
stories, dreams and questions new,
leading you at last to find
that you're a treasure in God's mind.

In the Bible, words for you,
words of love, strong and true:
Jesus died to make you free;
lives again, your Friend to be.

--- Linnea L. Burr, 2011

September, in summary.

I've been taking photos for the past month, I promise! Here's a quick catch-up for you:

Banana cream pie from scratch - turned out deliciously!! The custard was delicious.

A whole big kettle full of apple sauce from the apples we picked up in our yard - mmm!


And an apple-blueberry pie for good measure. The cute little star cut-outs in the crust are from an antique cookie cutter that I picked up for 75 cents at an antique store.
I've been loving my Pyrex mixing bowls, and just got a medium-large light yellow one, courtesy of my mom. I now have one of each size - large yellow, medium-large light yellow, medium red, small blue. Yay!

Here is my first ever attempt at meringues - they look great, here...
...and here. They also tasted yummy. However, they were sooo sticky! They didn't get crispy enough. I'll try again, another day.


September has also included so much busyness at grad school, various conducting opportunities, weekend travel, football, poetry-writing, reading, not enough knitting, and time with the handsome husband. That's September, in summary!

november?

Grad school has been dizzyingly busy.

This past month, I conducted in a masterclass with Dr. Rene Clausen, a well known composer and the director of the Concordia Choir. It went really well, and I was inspired. It was a much-needed bit of inspiration in a semester that has been difficult.

In the past two weeks, the College Choir has performed in three concerts; we had to travel to nearby cities for two of those concerts. This is a feat of organization, and I'm pretty sure I couldn't have done it and stayed sane, had it not been for the help of the choir president. He has been great at putting tour crews together, organizing driver lists, and making sure our equipment is set up. We had plenty of obstacles to overcome, but everyone has been so cooperative and willing to help. It seems like we have a great group of people this year!

I enjoyed a piano recital tonight - something I missed in these past three years. My undergraduate years were filled with this sort of thing, and I didn't really cherish these opportunities like I do now. High-quality, free concerts? okay by me.

Whew. Research for my research class is exhausting. I've confirmed that this is not for me. I am so done with my topic - but I still have to keep digging. It seems that as soon as I've answered my initial curious question, I just don't have the drive to go on.

Brad finally did get a job, for which we're both grateful. We have enough money in our account to make our bills this month, and we will have a little bit left over. A blessing, for sure! We're not thrilled with the hours that his job demands - 10am to 11pm, M-Th, but we are trying to stay positive about the blessing of a job.

These past few weeks, we've been operating on a one-car system - a tough thing, since Brad drives 70 minutes to a nearby city for work most days. I have had to depend on the charity of my friends to take me to and from school... a humbling experience. I'm grateful for my friends.

It seems that this first semester has been about simply keeping my head above water, doing just the bare minimum - making ends meet, finishing today's homework, doing the little household chores and neglecting the bigger ones. I was thankful for a canceled class this morning, which allowed me to do laundry, bake bread, mend a pair of pants, and wash the pile of dishes...not to mention sleeping in and cuddling with my husband, whom I rarely see. It makes me want to cry! I'm so tried emotionally and physically. I am not very old, but I feel the effects of this on my body. I'm not as young as I was in undergrad... funny, yes?

A good friend at school has agreed to pray with me once a week, and that has been great. I'm so glad to have her friendship and to be able to support her in prayer, as well has having her support of me.

There is more left to do this evening...so I'm out.

a brighter day

I'm glad that God allows us to still have flowers through the autumn season - I love the beauty of raindrops on pink petals, bright yellow mums, and the smooth orange flesh of pumpkins...

back in the saddle again

I'm studying! It's so strange to be doing this again - actually opening my Music History book and trying to remember a list of terms that's many pages and centuries long. However, I'm enjoying the cup of jasmine green tea and bowl of fruit loops next to me, and the very furry Oscar Cat at my feet. It's nice to have my own desk, to have my laptop set up with wireless internet, and to be in a space that feels like my own. I haven't had my own study/work space for about two years, now, and this is great!

On another note, it's hard to have the confidence I once did about these subjects. I know I've forgotten so much of this, though it's coming back. My husband will be helping me to study...

Onward.

pumpkin carving party

this afternoon we had a pumpkin carving party at our friend, Sarah's house. here's how mine turned out:
to make the leaf cutouts, i traced a real maple leaf onto the pumpkin with a sharpie. it could also be scored into the pumpkin with a pencil, i suppose. i then cut out the bottom of the pumpkin to get rid of all the seeds and gunk. this makes it easier to light a candle inside - no reaching deep into the pumpkin. i made a little votive-sized indentation in the bottom part so that the candle would be more stable. finally, i cut out the leaf shapes, wiped the outside of the pumpkin clean, and put a candle in. ta-da!


for the little "happy fall" pumpkin, i used watercolor paint, and it's beginning to chip already. that's just all the paint we had there - should've used acrylic, i know. it still looks cute, and it's temporary. hooray for fall decorating!

taking a few little steps

i started my job at our church on Tuesday afternoon. i was immediately inundated with a (rather loud) tutorial for one of the programs, graciously given by the youth director (who took an hour of his time to help me). the hours since were a flurry of new passwords, learning how to use both a planning website and a powerpoint-like presentation program for creating song slide shows. part of my challenge was to transfer over the main name on the accounts to my name, as i am now the administrator for them. this took some round-about work, but it's all worked out now. one headache, six hours, and many emails and tutorials later. did i tell you? it's a worship and music coordinator position. 10 hours/week, paid (pretty well, actually). i'm really happy to be serving in this way, and to be administrating music. it seems like the skills i learned in realty are paying off a bit, which is gratifying. it's so nice to also be able to use my music knowledge!

i have also been hired to accompany for some concerts at an area elementary school, and i am officially on the active sub list for the district. i have one piano/clarinet student, and i may get some more students in a bit. i've put out my business cards and contacted the music teachers at the area schools - who knows? maybe i'll have a full studio by the end of the year.

Oscar, my kitten, is growing like crazy. When we first got him, his collar was about two inches too big, even on the smallest hole. Now he's wearing it on the smallest hole....cute.

it has been a difficult beginning to the school year - my husband is so very busy, and we hardly ever see each other. it's heartbreaking. i really never thought he would have to work and do school at the same time, and it's really draining for him. my job alone isn't enough to cover our expenses, and neither is his job. i know that God will get us through, and i'm trying to trust.

on love, conflict, and sacrifice

remember the orange berries i found last week?
they shed their little orange skins and reveal a red berry on the inside!

you know how sometimes two people just don't agree on what is good art? that happened to me over the weekend. and it was very personal, since what we were disagreeing on was the proper way to treat and arrange the photos from my wedding. the photographer thinks it looks great arranged this way, and we discovered our fundamental difference: abstract/minimalism vs. concrete/realism. in short, she'll re-do a few pages for us, but the rest will stay the same. it's a good thing we are both people who like to serve and want to make the other person happy, because this could have been really ugly. conflict is not one of my favorite things.

speaking of conflict, one thing that really bothers me is when i've been alone all day, and my husband comes home and wants to sit at his computer without speaking to me for the whole evening. oh, wait. we do have dinner together, so i should be happy, right? i understand that he's had a long day at school and that he needs alone time. it's just really hard for me to give that to him when i've been alone all day. is this what sacrifice and real love is about for me? does this mean that i need to let go of my desires and let his be first in the picture? it's a hard balance. i have needs, too. i'm battling a cold, but i still have to cook, clean, pay bills, balance the budget, make cookies for next week's luncheon (see the picture i posted), and finish the sweater he's been bugging me to complete. at the same time, i need to make his lunch (i guess he could do that, but he doesn't), be sure i don't talk to him too much while he's researching, and try not to cry when he leaves at 11:15pm to get another new video game that we probably don't have the money for, when all i wanted was to have him hold me as i fall asleep.

i'm enjoying the leaf-filtered autumn sun spilling through my sliding glass door onto my coffee table . it just barely lights up the faces of my Willow Tree statue. it's a carving of a couple in love, with his arms around her waist, and her face upturned to look at his, and her hand gently cradling his cheek. i love my husband like that. i am his, and he is mine. i have promised to always love, honor, and cherish him. with God's help and strength, i will. i know he loves me, too, and that this season will not last. i know he's doing everything he can to balance doing well in school and being the man he needs to be at home. it's not an easy job, and i need to support him. God, give me the strength to accomplish these things in your time, with your patience, and in your way.

decorating is an art

today while i was out running, i found these bright orange berries on a bush that looked otherwise dead. they're probably poisonous, but my curiosity got the better of me, and so i plucked a stem and continued to run with them in hand. it looked rather funny, by the way! imagine this: i'm wearing a pair of gray Nike capris, running shoes, a bright neon yellow athletic shirt, and here are these orange berries on a stick bouncing around as i run. not only that, but my hair is disheveled because it's morning, and there's only so much i can do to make my ponytail look somewhat decent. at any rate, i arrived home and put them in some water in a spice jar, and they're now decorating my table.

after, of course, a brief photo shoot. :o) i was pleased to find that the orange of the berries is actually a little redder and brighter than the orange of my little pumpkin, and the dark stems in the glass make a nice contrast. i like how it's a bit Asian-inspired, with its sculptural, spare look. these would make great little favors for a fall wedding! wouldn't that be cool? or for a Thanksgiving dinner...

i really think that decorating is an art. it's sometimes hard to find the right color combinations, or the right size item - the best container, the most interesting cloth that won't detract from what's on it. and not only that, but to arrange the materials in an attractive way, so that nothing overpowers anything else except for good reason. i think i did a good job today.

on the orange theme, i reheated some amazing butternut squash soup for lunch. i need to try to make this - what i had came from a lovely company called V8. someday i'll package my food and sell it for a ridiculous price just because i added eight vegetables to a product that should only contain one. i had a coupon for this soup, by the way, that made it about 40% off the original price. hooray, bargains.

today i'm finding things to be thankful for. at the moment, i'm so happy to have had a hot shower, a hairdryer that works, tasty leftovers for lunch, and a great computer. the colors of fall are so vibrant - i love that! i'm enjoying the feeling of fuzzy sweaters, and feeling thankful for the last few wildflowers of summer. i just got a call from my husband - just to say that he loves me. earlier today i had an invitation to go shopping with a new friend, and i can't wait!
these are today's blessings.
and here's a link to my flickr page - i love taking photos! http://www.flickr.com/photos/from_linnea/

here i am!

it's very lonely here, so i'm blogging. lately, the days have been melding together into one continuous wakefulness, and i'm not always sure what day it is. tonight was my husband's first band concert in grad school, which broke up the monotony nicely.
you know the crisp, clear smell of autumn air? i'm enjoying that right now! i love how as the seasons begin, they each have their own unique smell.
even though it's really and truly finally fall, i found some beautiful wildflowers on this morning's run - a summer daisy and a handful of purple clover. nature makes me feel closer to God - His fingerprints are everywhere.
i'm working on knitting a sweater right now, and it's nearing completion! i'm done making the body of the sweater, and i'm finishing my second sleeve. soon i'll add the hood, the edging, and then i'll sew it all together. it's my first really big project - i've made hats, mittens, socks, scarves, baby booties, and baby sweaters before, but this is the first adult-size sweater i've tried. i haven't had trouble yet! i'm also going to be using a circular needle for the first time, and i'm excited. it's nice to have something to try to complete.
i'm a musician, and i've been letting my skills rest for too long. i need to practice piano more often. i played a little bit tonight, but my wrists were so sore that i had to stop. it will take time to build up to where i was when i graduated with my degree. a year of teaching will do that to you, i guess.
i'm maybe almost adjusted now to being a new wife. it has been very hard for me to stay at home alone all day and to try to find little tasks to do, manage the money, pay the bills, and find insurance policies that work for us. i had no idea this would be so hard, and i feel really alone in it all. have you been there? i've been "on my own" for a few years, but this is just so very different.

that's all for now.